A totally subjective review of less-ugly water sandals
If you’re reading this post, it’s probably because you follow me on Instagram, and if you do, please accept my apologies for the delay. About 6 weeks ago, I promised a review of all of the water sandals I was auditioning for an upcoming vacation… And I’ve finally found the time to report my findings!
If you know me from Insta, you probably are aware that I design and work on mostly what I refer to as “fashion shoes” - shoes that are not built with any specific activity in mind, other than walking, standing and coordinating with/acting as the finishing touch for an ensemble. In my mind, this also usually means that they’re made with a leather sole, and generally leather uppers. (Watch this space for my evolving opinion on the best materials for footwear.)
Athletic & athleisure shoes are a bit of an anomaly for me, both as a designer and a consumer… Reader, I have never owned a pair of sandals for the beach (I walk barefoot and fast as hell), much less ones that are appropriate for…. swimming??
And yet, at the end of May, I’ll spend a few days on a tiny island off of Sicily, where (if the weather is good), I’ll be able to make out the coast of Tunisia. This island has gorgeous swimming coves, but no sandy beaches.
In a bid to eliminate a hospital visit in Pantelleria from my vacation plans, I’ve realized I need sandals that can transport me across wet rocks into the sea… with some semblance of style?
So I ordered a half dozen or so to audition….
As a novice in the house of shoes-for-outdoor-activities, I polled my followers, who sent suggestions. I would have been sunk (perhaps literally) without these! Narrowing down to the field helped me really focus on the details, and the end use goals. Trying them all in person was essential. The winners certainly came out of left field.
The Olsen approved
The Teva Voya Infinity was my entry point - if you have ever Googled “chic women's water sandals olsen twins”, you will understand why I was tempted to think this style is the answer to our prayers that a water sandal can be chic.
They are, IRL about as chic as a totally non-leather, outdoor oriented, < $50 sandal could possibly be. They are soft, smooth, fairly complicated to get on the foot, but pretty flattering to most foot shapes (according to my research) and really really soft and smooshy under the foot.
What they do not seem to be is up to the task of transporting me from slippery, wet, rocks-only shores into the Mediterranean without risking concussion, and staying on my feet once in the sea. The sponginess of the sole materials seems to the the problem (taking on water and thus becoming very heavy), along with not-so-grippy soles.
My feet also run on the narrow side, so the paracord stretch straps ostensibly fit me, but felt quite loose, even for walking on dry land.
This style seems to fill the niche of a super-affordable chic-ish, soft and comfy, gorp-adjacent, still kinda femme sandals for city dwellers. They get rave reviews from those who aren’t asking for more than the Voya is offering.
Thinking that I might want to lean into a slightly more gorp-y vibe, I also ordered the Voyas in this beige color. I was not 100% convinced that a black strappy sandal is quite right for rock hopping.
Rejected for all the same reasons as the black, I also feel that these look a tad less elevated, a little cheaper, and sure, I guess a little more outdoorsy. Also the paracord felt even looser/less stretchy than the black - maybe better for those with a quite wide foot?
The almost-ubiquitous
I’ve tried the classic Teva Originals on & off since high school, and never felt good about them, but added this third Teva option to the cart, with the idea that the “Slim” version might feel more me.
I’ll admit that it does…. I liked it quite a bit. I wish Teva would make this style in half sizes, however. Though it doesn’t look so in this image, I felt like my toes were slightly too close to the edge of the thick-ish, heavy-ish sole. I’m a solid European size 39, usually an American 8.5, but basically never a 9. This is Teva’s size 8, which was recommended based on their sizing. I agree, the 9 would certainly be too big, but I’m worried that I might bump a big toe here or there when wearing.
Teva, can you hear me? Make half sizes!
The wildcard
A lovely Instagram follower suggested Nike’s (now defunct*) Oneonta sandal, as her ride or die, with the caveat that they are pretty wacky, and definitely not for everyone. I really really wish I was this kind of fashion girl - the older I get, the harder I find it to blend some “street” into what I wear. I thought maybe I could pull them off, but I they feel a little too much for me.
These are also an 8 (which I think Nike says is a 39.5!), and these are clearly too short. Otherwise they feel great on, and if you are confident pulling off this look, they feel like they would be quite grippy on wet rocks, though maybe slightly heavy for actually swimming in. Super comfy for walking about my studio during my test drive.
* I found these babies on GOAT, and didn’t properly check the return window, which i extremely brief and extremely well enforced. If you’re a US size 7.5 or 8, and are interested in these, hit me up!
The suspected associate of a actual cult
They arrive in a plastic bag with branding that can only bring to mind a prescription from a geriatric podiatrist. The soles are as flat & flimsy as can be. The founder of the brand provides a YouTube video on fitting that provides no actual information about fitting. The brand also offers make-your-own-at home kits. There’s a very change-yours-shoes-change-your-philosophical-outlook vibe to all that Zero shoes has to offer.
And yet…. they’re the style that Miu Miu copied! On the foot, the style is crazily, realistically close to mimicking its runway progeny in a way that doesn’t feel embarrassing. The marketing emails that follow a purchase is sketchily proselytizing.
But this flimsy barely-shoe has a super traction-y outsole and a thin layer of EVA foam under the foot that really feels great. My toes are close to the end of the sole, but it’s almost impossible to feel, because there’s barely any sole at all. These are, in fact, sandals that adhere to the principles of “bare foot” shoes. It’s all quite cult-y, but these actually feel & look the most feminine of everything I tried. Like a wackadoodle version of something I’d actually choose to wear.
At the same price as the Teva Voya, thanks to Miu Miu, this feel like it gives more or less the same amount of chic. We like it.
The sure thing?
Chacos entered this game as the ones to beat. The strappiness seemed to harken back to the original Teva Voya concept, and the gravitas of this brand is pretty convincing. I think I got more recs for Chacos than any other brand… I was also told that the break in is a real issue.
Break in times for shoes do not scare me - stay tuned to this channel for my hacks and tricks and time-tested methods of bending leather shoes to my will and whims…. However, I am not outdoorsy. I do not have the fortitude to spend two weeks breaking in hiking sandals that I will wear for 6-7 days on vacation. And I don’t think synthetic materials can endure my methods of alteration. There seemed to be no way around blisters.
I also don’t really love them on me. Again, with my narrow-ish foot, these feel overwhelming and give me the sense that I should be leading a group of middle schoolers in kayaks through the Grand Canyons, and extolling the virtues of bongs over vapes. This is very much not me.
The thing I already own
In the midst of this experiment, I started to feel like a bit of a fraud…. As someone who loves and makes shoes, I own too many, and I try to be cognizant of how many new pair I bring in to my life.
Getting a bit overwhelmed with all of the EVA off gassing in my bedroom and studio, I wanted to include this shop-your-closet entry to the list.
I love Message’s answer to the athleisure/Birkenstock category - their slides are minimal, supportive, comfortable and fun. They perform well, offer “recovery” compression for actual athletes, but also look just fine with boxer shorts and button up. They’re definitely waterproof, and I think would hold up quite well for both grip and stay-on-ness on a wet & rocky shore. However, on reflection (on my naïveté about this general category of shoes), I realized that the lack of straps, and the comfy but heavy cork footbed would end with my sandals at the bottom of the sea, and no way for me to safely exit the water. Light & floaty are key, and these sandals are not that.
Highly recommend for low key summer activities, but I’ll end how I started - realizing that outdoor-adjacent shoes are not purpose built for the wild. Nor am I.
The winners
I’ve already written so much more than I expected to on this topic, and this very specific research reminded me how uncomfortable we can get, when we’re outside our comfort zone. I didn't enjoy the hours surrounded by paracord, woven straps, plastic buckles, and a lot of sandals that are built wide because none of these materials has much if any stretch - the quality of strength combined with malleability is basically what makes leather more or less the perfect material for footwear. My delicate narrow foot does not oblige.
In the end, to came down to two styles I’d expected to reject quickly, and almost did.
I really don’t want to be wearing chunky, clunky shoes these days. I want good balance and I like a shoe that flatters my foot.
The Xeros and the almost classic Tevas are pretty much tied for me in the looks department, and it’s really only the fact that I can kind of be transported to the Miu Miu SS24 runway that tilted the scales.
That and packability. The Xeros take up about as much room in a suitcase as a pair of socks, and I think I’d rather use that extra room for a pair of sandals I can wear to dinner…. and that are made of leather.
Or maybe I’m kidding myself that I’ll wear anything else. Maybe seaside, a tiny sole and a couple of adjustable straps are all you need.
Happy first post!
I would love a post-vacay debrief not only on how these performed but also what you saw OTHER people wearing and if you liked anything you saw. xo
I loved reading this as a shoe affecionado, and I’m tempted by several of the styles! I must also say that I love your nailpolish